LIFE, ACCORDING TO BLAKE
Blake:  Mummy, do you remember on the news when those people took groceries without paying first?
Me:  Yes, buddy, I do.
Blake:  That was BAD!
Me:  Yes, buddy, that wasn’t right.
Blake:  Mummy, let’s pay for our groceries today and not steal them.  Ok?
Me:  Ok.  Good lesson.   (As if not paying for them was an option…?!?!?)

Life lessons.  We all learn them.  Sometimes knowingly, other times not.  Many times, we learn them the hard way.  Some we’ll always remember, and others we soon forget.  And while our intention is to teach our children things like good behavior and manners, I find that it is in fact our children who sometimes end up being the teachers.   (Though, for the record, I already knew the lesson Blake was teaching me about stealing… well, except for that gallon of milk that somehow managed to allude the grocery scanner.  And the package of chicken I forgot on the bottom shelf of my cart that one time.  I always meant to go back to pay.  Ah, crap.  Perhaps Blake had a point…)

Now that we have Blake, I realize just how much we want to teach him and how little time there is to teach it.  Be good to others.  Everybody is different and that’s ok.  Sometimes you win, and other times you don’t.  It’s good to have others be proud of you, but it’s most important to be proud of yourself.  You don’t have to be the loudest one in the room to be a leader.  Don’t talk back.  Sit up in your chair.  Stop picking your nose.  The cushionless couch does not double as a trampoline.  No, the word “poop” does not belong in every sentence.  Ok, so I threw in some of the instructions you may hear uttered both loudly and frequently in our home at the moment, but I think you’d agree that they still apply to us adults, too!

The one message I feel is the most significant and seems to permeate each and every other lesson we teach Blake is this… YOU MATTER.  It makes no difference who you are, what you look like, what zip code you live in, what you do for a living, how much money you have, how many things you own… YOU MATTER.  You are important, you have a gift to give and a purpose to serve.  You may not know what it is, but you will figure it out as long as you keep your eyes up and heart open.  Until then, we will keep reminding you.

It’s not good enough to tell your children that they matter.  You must show them.  And, while I’m at it, don’t be a “do as I say, not as I do” parent because your kids watch you ALL THE TIME.  They are perceptive and intuitive little human beings and they will adopt the behaviors you display and the ones you accept.  If you allow others to treat you poorly, they will think that is ok.  If you treat others poorly, they will think that’s ok, too.  So, SHOW THEM what is right.  Unfortunately, parents are not always going to be there to correct their child’s behavior or boost their confidence.  Children need the tools to do it for themselves.  So, do the right thing.. give them the tools they need and the autonomy to practice those skills.  Someday, they will thank you for it.

LIFE LESSON:  You are the only person who can be YOU.  There is no other YOU and that is pretty awesome.  So, don’t allow others to determine your self-worth because it’s possible that their actions may be the result of them not realizing that they matter too.
#youmatter